Wednesday, May 27, 2015

Dating

Inevitably, being alone brings to the front of our minds a desire to love and be loved. It is the most natural desire of any human being. This sublime and beautiful emotion, is what many see as the ugly head of sex, arising  like a phoenix from the pyre of failed marriages, 'partners,' and affairs, and, in a mix of desperation and hope, we join a dating site.
After a few meetings, men discover that photographs can be ten years old, and the word 'slightly,' when coupled with the word 'overweight,' evidences a great deal of difference in the mail and female dictionaries.
It is the same, or even worse, when men preen before women. My word! what young looking Lotharios we have here, on paper no woman could possibly fail to investigate such a bouquet of youthful charms and, possibly, it is always, 'possibly,' virility.
The cardinal rule of internet dating for men is this, 'Never, even in the remotest way, make a woman aware that you are interested in the ability of her underwear elastic to keep her knickers up.'
And for women, be your heart full of lustful romance, [ever reserved for a sexy novel,] always seek a man with a 'sense of humour, maybe more,' and never ever inquire of  other things such as thermals.
No religion ever speaks of the mutually enjoyable animal pleasures given to us by our Maker, and this castrates their gospels. They confine themselves to 'after life' fairy tales, and can never preach the real truth of the actual and attainable joys of 'heavenly', affectionate, and earthly loving.
He said 'Love one another,' and we get wars in His name,
What is wrong with us?
Blessings and Blossoms
Archpip Plumtree

Wednesday, May 20, 2015

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